Vickarieo's Thought Patterns

Congested Thoughts

Um somewhat

Stuck in a rut

Pass interrupt

Caught for what 

Giving not a fuck

Psychosis but not crazy

Schizophrenia consummated with paranoia 

Then brought forth this baby

In a sunny place

Where the people are cloud-like shady

Childhood rigid

Heart sickles frigid

Absent mind

Perturbed in an instance

Disturbed by nothing much

Locked in thought 

Affiliated with hate 

How much more will it take?

Before you break

What will it take?

To many considerations

Forgive my connotations

For I’ve been reiterating

The simplicity of life

Which is

To think twice 

A few words on how I feel

Every Adam has his Eve

Or Steve

It is preference

Is what I believe

So yes baby your the

Epitome of who I need 

For you i’ll sacrafice

For you ill bleed

TO young for these emotions

Until i reach back from across this ocean

Just to save you from the mediocre life

Is what I’m hoping for 

To cuddle 

With a loving embracing hold

Until my blood runs cold

Then a little more 

Baby your the one

I am certain

Want to stand with you 

Until they close the curtain 

On this life

But we lived as husband and wife

Without a thought twice

I wanna shout your name 

As we play this cruel game

Of love

I Love you

I want to be with you

Near you 

I do fear you 

Will leave before we get to be

Unity 

Please hold on…

Drug smugglers prayer

I sit on my perch

No father for the hour

SO enternal father hear my prayer

I gotta make it there

Can’t you see

While am on the sea

Wind breeze 

Money all in my mind

Gonna make it this time

Gotta make that dime

Gonna get mine

Been on this grind

Now I came to find

My self on this

100 foot yacht

Never to be caught

Rather be shot 

That’s about 3000 keys

6 hundred a block

Of pure unchopped

Nicaraguan 

About to kill the blocks

Once we make it cross the border

Gotta cross the border

I make it back to dock

Just to flip a block for $13,000 a pop 

Forgotten all the drama 

Bout to bring the load back

Kill the summer 

Few baby mamas 

So paid just might buy a llama 

If we make it cross the boarder

Cross the boarder

Gotta cross the boarder

AMEN!

um

Please come quicker

I waiting for ya

Heart racing as I am hanging

To and fro dangling

Your  caving in  and

The grip has become strangling

Lately I have been chillin with different factions

Trying to get a an easy reaction from what

I call a mind fuck

I think its a rap

So she texts back after a week

K.O’d I feel off my feet,

Weak.

I’m at awe

Like walking into a closed door

Which I hate,

I took a leap of faith 

Just to hear,

Wait.

For the goodness of sake 

For I am intoxicated of all I can take

Shot one

Shot two

Shot three

No more

Okay i’ll take shot four

For reasons I have none

Just wanna party 

Have fun

Responsibilities

Permissibly  I dismiss

As I take a deep whiff of the night air

Its quite transparent

Even though thoughts are incoherent

That my life take place 

At a fast pace

Behind the wheel of an F-1 Maclaren

I stay leering 

And I don’t mean staring !

Kinda shifty

Bullet one, 

I’m just in it for the fun

For the rush

Feel the cold hard steel with each touch

Bullet two

What more can I do

When its everything I knew

It was so brand new

To me

As I loaded bullet three

Where else could I be

Who else could it be 

But,

Me

Thoughts shallow

Hope dwindled 

Will hollow

Mind swindled  

By the thoughts

Its 50/50 as I flip my thoughts

Caged in this schizophrenic ounslught

“Break him, break him, break him”

They whisper, stutter and mummer

Mind games I wonder?

Then think?

And even futher ponder?

Really though?

Its like secretly I’m the star of some lame prank TV show?

In my hands lye no cash

For the hate mail

Critics that backlash

Constantly they back sass

Truthfully,

They could all kiss my black ass

However,

My cheeks are now sore

I mean I just can’t take anymore

Spin, Spin, Spin

With the flick of a wrist 

Stop at the first click

This might be it

Holy shit

Bienvenido to my death

Should I hold my breath?

Yes, squeeze the trigger!

Oh shit!

In just the blink of an eye

My whole life drives by

Like a Audi on the autobon

I’m gone

Eyes open

Its a false alarm 

Prevention

One young girl

Plus new born

Minus money

We all Ha ha ha

But its not funny

Its not funny at all

As we splurge and we ball

They just wish they had any at all

She just wish she wasn’t so poor

On the floor 

She can’t take any more

Strapped with tape and a trash bag 

She makes a quick nab

As  she sells a soul to the river

A life dangled over the bridge

What is the price of freedom

Where you live?

No moses story 

Just a sad twisted 

Bit sadistic tale

Of a mother who terribly failed

No Bible stories, But by now that baby

Could be in  the stomach of a whale

The sad folk of the one who never asked to be born

Sinking to a pit of forever scorn

No baptisms 

Just a child dying 

A teenager crying

In the midnight sky

With no one to wonder why

Leaning over a bridge

Crying about what you did

Why did ya?

Who pushed you too it?

If you didn’t have the child,

Would you have to do it?

Today (some lame ass valentines day poem)

I don’t even want to play

Those foolish love games

On this dumb ass day

So idiotic for one to think of another

As life partner 

or

As a lover

For time constricts the relationship

Until your smothered by one another

Unless you become father and mother

But that takes time

Darling that takes time

Time we don’t have in just one day

So lets dismiss the day

Inflate it with infatuation 

Until I’m brimmed with love 

TO boast to the nation 

Of each others eternal dedication

So I’m sorry if I never said happy “today”

Because I have valentines day

Everytime you come my way…

Why do they love me so?

Catch me dancing on the air

With a jist

Living without care

Like a wisp

I float from here to there

Lingering for the just a moment

Then poof, vamoose!

I’m gone.

Catch me at the end of a spark

Getting lifted on the dark

Moon sky

As the larks

Fly high

Floating into the breeze

As I am wheezed

From the lung

Of the young and old

Exhaling me as if there soul

What is the goal?

I wonder

As I intoxicate 

With every intake

What thing I am

Not a girl or a guy

Proud to be the provider of your jokes

I am

The smoke ; )

Longing for?

What is that which of you yearn?

Nothing is set in steel,

Is what I learned,

As I waited my turn,

To kneel before the guillotine,

Life is unfair,

Destiny is ruthlessly mean,

Faith called it quits before they left the scene,

Lord knows,

Lord knows!

I’m not the one to shadow,

Or follow,

Like the headless horseman of sleepy hollow,

I’d rather be hung from the gallows of pity,

Than to lose my mind,

Literally this time,

Literally I’m fine,

But figuratively,

A car accident just occurred once again,

In my brain,

I was just driving my self to insanity, 

Until I was rear-ended by vanity,

Which caused such a calamity,

Its to dangerous,

Turn back,

Before you bright future,

Turns black,

Dimmed to the point of never no return,

Before you take another turn,

Ask yourself,

What is it of which you yearn? 

Faded to long

I don’t want to sound disingenuous

On the other hand,

This relationship, has become strenuous

And,

I strongly feel we can’t continue us

The plan,

Was to run off into  the night in a hurry

Caught in a cold shouldered flurry

Our vision of each other now blurry

So uneventful

Scornfully sensual

Sexual as usual

This tossed away like the jist

As if just was enough.

Stressful form of denies

You lied?

I’m too surprised

Look at the water brimming over my eyes

These are not tears

I refuse to cry

I refute your name

Disputed uncertainties

Severe the ties that bonded up the blame

Lay waste to the lame

As it bares my name

As it bores away

And away

And away

Away

Wait for me!